Life in the Fish Bowl


Proof That I'm Really 12

So it is late night. I should be asleep, but I'm nursing a new found addiction to Spider Solitaire. You know, that free game that comes with Windows? Yeah, that's the one.

Anyway, I'm watching Books that Were Left Out Of the Bible, or some shit like that, and all of a sudden this infomercial is on. It's for the Slap Chop. Some cheap ass mini chopper which I'm sure isn't nearly as good as my one from Pampered Chef. But it does come with free shit...

So dude is talking up the Slap Chop big time. He's excited. If I was in the other room I'd probably think I was hearing bad porn. But I digress.

Dude is slapping.

Dude is chopping.

Then Dude says:

Come on. You're gonna love my nuts.


I was kind of in a shitty mood, but that cracked my ass up.

With a super serious, but excited face, a grown man on a television commercial told me I was gonna love his nuts! ~snicker~

They just say I was born in 1968, but I know. I know I'm really 12.

I'm Still Here...

Hi, blogland!! Long time no see. Or I guess more appropriately, long time no write. Because I do read, even though the writing, both blogging and commenting, is almost nonexistent. I'd blame it on the pregnancy if it hadn't started before that. I guess since that is out of the question as far as blame - and I'd never blame myself, of course - I'll have to blame the hubby. It's always their fault anyway, isn't it? No matter what the issue? Sure. That's why we married them, to have someone to blame our shit on!

Anyway, life around here is going good, if busier than I really like. I'll be 20 weeks this Thursday, so baby Orange Juice - you can thank Punkin for that name - is growing and thriving. It seems like just yesterday I found out I was finally pregnant, but then again it seems like time is crawling by at a snail's pace. We have picked a name - or more accurately Punkin picked a name. He is SO into this pregnancy. It makes it even more fun. He's gonna be a great big brother. Oh, and I guess I should say "it" is a she! He will tell you he decided that, too, by wishing really hard. Who knows? Maybe he did...

I'm back in school now, just two classes this semester, though. Punkin is back in school three days a week, one of which is a free day for me which will be really nice, as I didn't have one last semester. What to do on that day? Hmmmm....facebook laundry, read/write blogs dishes, hang with the girls study? Wonder which ones of those will win out? Any guesses?

Punkin is also growing like a weed. He is so damn big these days! Talks like he's 15, usually has at least three girls he is stringing along, corrects my errors (I know you are surprised, but I do make them...occasionallly), and never slows down. He will either keep me young (ish) or send me to an early grave, depending on the day you ask me. Right now he is marrying Grace Ann - ask me tomorrow who my future DIL will be as it may change. He does know that he isn't marrying me - but only because I am already married!

Life without the happy pills is interesting. My fuse? Not short. No, it is nonexixstant. My patience? Don't count on me having any. Therefore, I'm pretty much just trying to avoid situations that call for either fuses or patience, which face it folks, is pretty fucking hard to do. A friend has even recently said I was getting crotchety. Hmph. Maybe a little hermitish, but I don't know about crotchety!!!

I am having to fight the hermit urge really hard, though. I tell you I could sit in my house for a week and never leave and it would be alright with me. I do fight it though and sometimes get out of my own choosing, but usually it is someone dragging me out, even if they don't realize that is what they are doing. Thank god for school and friends who go, go, go or poor Punkin would be a shut in! I tell you some of these girls - and you know who you are! - never sit still! It's good though, because it gets me out and when I get out I enjoy it. It's just the dragging my ass up off the couch part that is the problem.

Ok, I'm gonna go now and try to get a little studying done. Thanks to all of you who made it through this not so thrilling post. I'm starting to feel the blogging itch just a little (maybe lack of happy pills there, too?), so I'll probably be around a little more. Till then - love ya, miss ya...see ya!