Warning: This is gonna be one of those long, non humorous, introspective posts. If you came here looking for giggles, you'd best come back another day!
I've been through a lot of changes in the past few years. Going from not wanting a baby, to wanting one, to struggling to get pregnant, to having my Punkin. Then moving back to Hellabama, two new jobs, new responsibilities, becoming a stay at home mom, losing half of our income. Add to that secondary infertility, miscarriages, and just daily life and, wow, I'm exhausted thinking about it.
I'm feeling better these days, though it was rough for a while. My marriage was more than a bit shaky and so was my attitude. Thanks to my beloved happy pills, some good friends and a lot of soul searching, I am back to my old self. I've found myself talking a lot about finding balance in my life, balancing wife, mother, housekeeper, friend, blogger, daughter, myself - balancing life.
I'm not good at balance - ask Poodlehead or My2Sons, they've seen me at the gym trying to stand on one foot. But these days I'm feeling that the balancing act is getting a bit easier and less work to accomplish. That balance I was searching for, both mentally and physically, is seeming more and more like something I can attain.
Yet yesterday as I was putting on my makeup ( yes, I have worn makeup two times in two days, which of late is quite unusual!), I started thinking about control. Controlling yourself - myself - mentally, physically, and emotionally. Because as much as I have been thinking balance was what I was lacking and in such dire need of, and I still think it is very important, I'm wondering if the thing for me really wasn't control all along.
Let's get this out of the way first. I am a damn control freak. I like to do things my way. Not that my way is always the right way, but, well ok, it usually is. Don't go hating me for it though. I'm kidding of course. Kinda. Even when someone else is making the decisions I have to feel like it is because I am letting them, therefore retaining my control.
When I'm not in control, either passively or actively, I get - you guessed it - out of balance. These past couple of years since moving back south I have felt out of control. I had jobs where I couldn't seem to get a firm grasp of things. I had a hubby who I all of a sudden couldn't figure out. I had a little boy who was getting to "that age". I had no local friends, my ass was the size of a mobile home, my hair was frizzy again (damn southern humidity).
I was out of control in every way I can think of, but just didn't realize it. Which is odd for someone who thinks she knows everything, but whatever. The exception that proves the rule, right?
About three months ago I did a post about taking a day off. I sat and cried all of that day. I took my son to my mother's house, crying all the way. I told her I was sick to explain away the puffy face. On the way home my doc called to tell me my blood work was back and not only was I not pregnant, I hadn't even ovulated. You can imagine that the waterworks went into overdrive after that call.
Shortly after hanging up I called my doc back and left a message on her voice mail asking for something, anything, to make me feel better. To make a long story short, they called in the meds, I started taking them and wha la! Life seemed better again. The world lifted off of my shoulders.
I regained some control.
Everything isn't perfect. We still need a second income, but don't have it. Hubby is still 12 years old. Punkin is still going through his toddler years and testing me at every turn. I'm still in Hellabama sweating away (and currently without power, thanks to you, battery backup!) and my ass is still wide as a trailer. But I can handle it.
In control of my emotions once again, I decided to get in control of my body. I've been working out on a daily basis for three weeks now and I feel great. I have more energy, I'm losing weight without starving myself (yes, I ate Mexican for lunch today. Thanks Jen! Everyone who is rolling their eyes at me? Bite me.). I'm in control of my body again and it feels great.
My house? Still out of control. But I'm working on it. I'm not gonna let it control me any longer. No more not asking people over because I'm embarrassed at the chaos that I live in. I'm nearly 40 years old and I'm taking control of my domain. And it feels good.
During this not so great time I joined a local moms group. Which, coincidentally, just happened to be the coolest moms group ever. Apologies to you who live elsewhere, but ours is the best. Move here. Join us. Anyway, through this last year I met a lot of people and have made some great friends who are willing to listen when I need to bitch and complain and who also let me know I'm not in this alone. I've taken control of my social life - hell, I went out and found one! - and again, it feels great.
Lastly, but not leastly (ok, I know that's not a word, but I though it just sounded right. I never said I was in control of my grammar or spelling), I found this wonderful world of blogs. Writing my blog and reading your blogs really pulled me through some tough emotional times. When I was feeling like I didn't have a friend in the world and that I just couldn't take it anymore, all I had to do was check my email and there you were. Thanks guys. Schmmmmack!
I know I've not been around as much lately, as all of this taking control has taken much of my former blogging time, but I'm still reading, even if I've become a shitty commenter. (Was that a long, poorly formed sentence or what?). But I must say, it is nice to have a real life again.
So balance? Control? Balance and control? Control and balance? I don't know. Can you have one without the other? I am just finally feeling like maybe I have a little bit of both and wanted to share. Because, damn, it feels great. So go out and take control of your life, if you haven't already. Drugs? They sure help you get started, but you are the one who has to step up and start taking control of your life.
Try it. You'll like it. I did.
Isn't it funny how when you wait to the last minute to wash a load of darks some asshole, uh, I mean hubby, leaves a wad of Kleenex in his pocket? So of course when you go to pull your black jeans out to put them in the dryer so you can wear them an hour later they, and everything else in that load, are covered with loads of lint. That asshole.
It is even funnier when you realize that not only are the clothes covered with lint, but they have some type of jelly looking stuff on them. Of course you continue pulling clothes out,
Then you realize it wasn't that asshole after all. It was that dumb ass.
That dumb ass who washed a pull up with the load of darks.
Is it only my old eyes playing tricks on me, or is John Edwards over their in my My Blog Log visitors????
So the study was determining pain thresholds under a few different conditions. We had heat applied in varying degrees and had to indicate when it felt painful and when we had reached our limit. We had heat applied while holding our hand in a cooler of ice water. But the absolute worst? We had a blood pressure cuff applied extremely tightly and had to indicate our pain level. All of this pain was rated on a scale of 1 to 100.
I went first, then Poodlehead. The heat wasn't too bad, though when they did a couple of short bursts of extreme heat? I must admit I kind of
But that blood pressure cuff? Holy shit, that was tough. I made it about 13 1/2 minutes (cut off time was 15 minutes), but I was in some real discomfort by the time I called it quits. My arm was pretty much completely drained of blood and the discoloring was very obvious. When the cuff was released my arm lit up like one of those cheap electric fireplace logs from the 70's. Then it tingled for another hour.
I think the highest pain rating I gave was a 93 and that was my last rating before calling it quits on the blood pressure cuff. Poodlehead? 100, 100, 100!!!! I think we were both trying to hold out longer than the other, but it was really hard to determine what to do. Across the board I felt pain sooner than her, but had more tolerance for it. I always thought I had a high pain tolerance level and this just proves it.
So basically we let some guy torture us for a couple of hours for $50 gift cards. Do you think that makes us cheap or just easy? Hmmmmm...... If we hadn't been being tortured for money (Poodlehead told the guy that he was charring her!) we would have been at the gym paying for the priviledge of torturing ourselves.
Cheap, easy, and dumb? Maybe. But now I've got $50 just burning a hole in my pocket and no visible scars to show for it. Pretty
I got this email this morning from a friend and wanted to pass it along on my blog. I seem to know so many people - IRL and through my blog - who have been touched in some way by autism that I want to do anything I can do to help raise awareness and maybe contribute to making their - and their kids - life just a bit easier.
So you people out there - go use your many powers for good. Click on the link, watch the video and raise a little money for a good cause.
And for you skeptics out there, not that I am one - of course not!- here is a link to Snopes verifying the authenticity of the facts stated below.
The band, "Five for Fighting", is generously donating $0.40 to
Autism Speaks for *each time* the below video is viewed. This funding then goes
toward research studies to help find a cure.
When you have a moment, please visit the link below to watch the
video and pass it along to your friends and family. They are aiming
for 10,000 hits, but hopefully we can help them to surpass this goal.
Why do you blog? If you check up at the top there, there's a button which gives you a big spiel on why I blog. But really? I guess I do it
What was the first blog you ever read? The first blog I ever read was I'm A Mom's blog. I didn't even know what a blog was at the time. But one thing led to another and here I am, boring you with my brilliant attempts at humor and tales of my oh so exciting life.
What was the first blog that had you hooked? Hooked? Really hooked? Catwoman and Redneck Mommy. I felt like such a stalker, but soon got to like the stalkerish feeling. But when I got my first (and maybe only) comment from them? I was giggling like a school girl. And I'm soooo not a school girl.
Which blogger friend would you most like to meet in real person? I'm lucky enough to met quite a few of the bloggers I read since it seems that having a blog must be a requirement to join my Moms group. Then I've talked to several of those who are further away on the phone. Does that count as meeting? Oh, and I met one previously unknown blogger for breakfast. And lunch. On the same day. But, really, I can't pick. There are too many. If gas ever goes back down to a reasonable price I am going on a grand blog tour of the US. Oh, and Canada, too. So you chicks who were nice enough to provide your addresses for Christmas cards
Which blog do you admire the most, why? Again, how am I supposed to pick? I read too many and love you all. Wouldn't be reading you and wasting my valuable
How different are you in real life than in your blog? I think I'm pretty much the same in real life. Maybe a little bitchier in real life and I cuss waaaaaay more than I do on my blog. Plus, my ass is even larger in real life than how I make it out to be on my blog. Oh, and I'm even lazier than I say, too.
How many blogs do you keep up with on a daily basis? I cut back a while ago, so I only have about 62 ( I had to count) on my Bloglines now. But since the happy pills and the gym came along? I don't get to read all of them everyday, though I get to them all at least once a week. I've become a piss poor commenter, too. I'm still reading though. Having a real life has really gotten in the way of my blogging.
Link to your 123rd post. Or your 3rd, if you don't have 123. Damn. Count 123 posts? At dinner time? Geeze. Here it is. Or close to it anyway.
Who do I tag? I tag everyone who wants to be tagged! And if you tagged me for something or awarded me something and I haven't gotten to it? I'm blaming it on my happy pills. Come on folks, I can't even keep up with my own keys.
Isn't it funny how even though you are dressed for the gym, ready to workout and totally on time, you somehow can't find your keys? Or your spare keys? It's hard to drive to the gym without keys.
Ok, so I found my spare keys at 9:45 and my class started at 9:30. It takes me 15 minutes to get there. Guess me and my dumb key losing ass will hit the treadmill at home today.
But we are going to play with friends - both of us - this afternoon so the day isn't totally shot.
Though I really should stay home and clean this pig sty so I can find my keys. And to top it off - they have a big, yellow duck on them.
You ask "Why a big yellow duck?"
So I can find them, of course.
We. Have. Snow.
Not tons of it or anything. Not even enough to cover up the grass (when I lived way north of here I didn't even count it as snow unless you could no longer see the grass), but still, it was snow.
My kid? Freaked out!
No, not out of joy. It was coooold. Waaaaah.
Is this really my child? Seriously. He had on flannel lined pants, a fleece sweater, boots and a big ass London Fog bulky coat. Me? I had on my house shoes, pajamas, and a short coats. Of course I had the camera, but the damn battery is dead and
Anyway, he stayed outside about five minutes and then came in. Hubby was crushed. Because he, really, is only twelve. Please, don't tell the law on us, ok?
Punkin had a birthday party to go to this afternoon at Pump It Up, but it was canceled. He was not pleased. Hubby saved the day by taking him to WalMart, which gave me a bit of time to jump on the treadmill. Speaking of the treadmill, I think it has a gremlin. The damn thing will cut on and off by itself, the incline only works on no grade or 15%.
And 15%? Kicks. My. Ass. Plus the cutting off on it's on is really annoying. How am I supposed to watch Angel smack the bad guys around if ever so often I get thrown backwards by the damn treadmill? Hubby is down there taking a look at it now. Hopefully there is just a big wad of cat fur in it or something and he can clean it up and get it back to working properly. Because my other alternative, my StairMaster is just like that 15% grade. Kicking. My. Ass. Looking for this photo, I noticed used StairMasters going for around $1299. I paid $1250 for mine (used) over ten years ago. Guess I got a decent deal, huh? Maybe I should dust it off a bit more and sell it. That would pay for a couple of years at the gym. Plus the whole kicking my ass part.....
Today makes my 14th day of either going to the gym or walking on the treadmill. Yes, I am bragging and I am very proud of myself. This is the longest I have stayed with any type of fitness plan - be it a diet or exercise - since I bought the StairMaster, way back when. I've got a brand spanking new, pretty scale to watch those numbers drop on and I'm still very motivated. Though this weekend? I'm feeling Thursday and Friday's workouts.
I guess I better go get busy on this nasty house before Punkin wakes up from his nap. We finally - don't judge - got our Christmas tree down this week and I've started moving the furniture back in place. How in the hell does so much crap accumulate under a chair in a month? Because under that chair I moved? Enough goldfish, raisins, crumbs, etc, to feed Ethiopia for a week.
Or to feed those skinny girls at the gym - you know who you are - for a month.
Boy this was a rambling post, huh? One last thing. I want to spruce up my layout a bit. Any suggestions?
Thirteen Reasons Why I Won't Be Doing The Water Workout At The Gym
- It's at night, which means Punkin ends up staying up way too late.
- I'll would have to buy a few new bathing suits, which, you know, cost money.
- Buying bathing suits is depressing and I'm all about happy these days.
- I would have to change clothes at the gym twice, which means I have to be there even longer than usual. I may be going to the gym, but I'm still lazy.
- There are no changing rooms at the gym so I'd have to change out in the open.
- I'm not keen on sharing my bare fat ass with the world, especially the world of skinny minis who congregate at the gym.
- I'm also not keen on sharing my saggy, braless boobs with them.
- That pool was freaking cold.
- When I go at night I have to go by myself and I'd rather have company.
- I don't have to wear a bathing suit to body pump and I'll still get a good workout.
- Did I mention the pool was cold and I was in a bathing suit?
- Going to the gym at night reeeeeaaaalllly cuts into my tv time. AI anyone? The Inferno?
- If I go to the gym in the morning I get to workout with my girlz, Poodlehead and My 2 Suns. And those chicks rock, even if they don't really need the gym!
Punkin and I went to the gym tonight. That's twice today for me if anyone
It wasn't easy. In fact, I'm feeling the day after aches already. I think this will be a good one - and it was full of a bunch of big mamas like me, which makes me feel right at home.
Afterwards we went to the Dollar Tree, which is next door,
Unless you have a pile of chips and salsa. And queso. Damn, I'm getting hungry again and off of the track.
So we are driving home. After getting our food, but before I punched his straw into the roof of my car, therefore punching it out the bottom of the cup and releasing a kid size diet lemonade into the console of my car, he and I were chatting.
Transcript of the conversation as follows:
Did you have fun playing in the pool, Mommy?
No, Punkin, I wasn't playing. I was exercising.
Uhhhh, Mommy is trying to exercise because she wants to lose weight and be smaller.
Mommy wants her bohunkus (yes, this is one of our favorites for our ass and no, I don't want to hear your comments on it) to be smaller.
Yes. I want my bohunkus to be smaller. Like C's Mommy.
NO! I DON'T WANT YOU TO!!
Why, baby? Don't you want Mommy's bohunkus to be small like C's Mommy?
NO! I LIKE YOUR BOHUNKUS LIKE IT IS!!! I LIKE IT BIG. I LIKE YOUR BOHUNKUS. I LIKE IT BIG AND I DON'T WANT IT TO BE SMALL!
Punkin, you know I love you, right?
He loves me more than Noodle Rings and likes my ass fat. Is he the perfect man or what? Ladies, he'll be eligible in about 20 years. I think there's gonna be a line at my door...
Hear that? That clock ticking so loudly? That's me and my old (yes, it's old) biological clock. Hubby and I have been working on a sibling for Punkin for over two years now. Obviously we haven't been very successful. I have had two miscarriages and other than that nothing.
This was the month. If I was pregnant this month I would deliver a baby just a day or two shy of my 40th birthday. Yes, I AM that old. I've had a bit of a roller coaster ride the past few days. My dear friend Aunt Flo hasn't chosen to visit me. She should have been here Saturday and she is always on time.
Yes, I took a test. In fact, I have taken five so far. Thank god for the $1 ones at the Dollar Tree. All negative. A couple seemed to have a very faint second line, but it was faint enough that it could have just been my imagination. The one I took this morning either didn't have a faint line or I am just being more realistic today.
I talked to my doc's nurse this afternoon and she says I'll need to come in by day 35 if I haven't started yet. Seems I could have a cyst on my ovary that could be keeping me from even ovulating. She also confirmed that if I was pregnant the test should probably already be showing as positive.
All I can say is holy shit, if it wasn't for my happy pills I'd be pretty out of it right now. This infertility business is a real bitch. It would suck at any age, but at mine? It sucks worse. I really, no, I really, really, really want another child, but I don't see myself doing so up into my 40's.
So when do I stop trying? Hoping? Yearning? Because I don't feel like stopping, but I don't feel like keeping on. It is such a roller coaster ride and I, for one, despise roller coasters. I know I'm not the only one who is going through this or has gone through it in the past, but damn, I sure feel like it at times.
And my Punkin is just baby crazy right now. I would so love to give him a baby brother or sister. I don't want him to grow up by himself. But sadly, it is looking like that is exactly what may happen.
I have four more of those cheap tests. Maybe I'll go take one now. Because as hard as it is to keep hoping - I still am.
at 5:03 PM | Labels: pregnancy
Yes, to grandmother's - well, Nanny's and Granny's - house we go. Seems Granny is having some problems again. She has never quite recovered completely from the ankle break and I just don't know how much longer she is going to be able to live on her own. She is adamant that she isn't leaving her apartment, but I just don't know.
Yesterday as my mother was coming in her door, Granny was moving in her power wheelchair and went to sleep or passed out briefly, running into her table and knocking stuff all over the place. She still kept her hand on the power so she just kept hitting it. She bruised up her arm and her wrist. I'm thinking today, which of course is Saturday, we may need to take her to an Urgent Care and get it x-rayed.
I'm gonna go by and see her for a few and hopefully get her to eat something. She hasn't been wanting to eat anything much anyone brings her and really can't get up and cook much right now. Mother has bought her microwaveable things, but of course she doesn't like ANY of it. She's drinking Ensure, but needs to eat more real food.
I guess 91 is just a tough age. I understand the need/desire to stay independent, but if she is hurting herself I think we are going to have to consider other options. When she does cook, she fries EVERYTHING. What happens when she has something on frying and goes to sleep? She'll burn the place down - along with herself.
I just don't know what we are going to do. My mother is pretty frazzled. She is an only child and lives just a few minutes away so pretty much all of Granny's care/business falls to her to handle. I hope things get better. I really do. Yall be sending good vibes her way, ok?
So I guess I better get up and get moving. I just put in my treadmill time for today and my legs are rubbery, but I think I can probably drag myself out to the car. Some good news for today? Down another .5 pounds! So much for weighing myself every three months!
Oh, yeah. My scale is going a bit bonkers. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I want another good one which will match up with the doctor's scale. Any suggestions? For under a million dollars, too, please?
Yall all have a great Saturday! Come join me at the gym tomorrow for yoga as I'll be on my own. We could even do body pump before yoga if you'd like. Damn, I hope I'm able to keep this up long term......
My boys, they love me.
They wanted to give me hugs.
Water glass: hits floor.
You guess hubs response.
Of course Punkin repeats it.
Yes, his first "OH SHIT".
That one was all his.
'Cause I've been watching my mouth.
Hope he spares Nana.
Yes, I bragged on him
In my last haiku. Jinx me.
Last week? Poops in pants.
He tried to make it,
But that tiger in the car?
He came up the stairs.
Told me his leg was messy
And he was sorry.
Saying or doing -
Our house is all about shit.
What's my name? B.M.
It is nice to be missed though! But seriously, yall can't get rid of me that easily. It just takes me a bit of time to settle into a routine and I'm not there yet. I honestly don't know how I ever held down a job, because my time management and organizational skills are pretty much nonexistent at this point.
I haven't give up though. I'll be back to my somewhat organized, always on time, deadline meeting, blog, blog, blogging self soon. Hopefully.
Good news? I lost three pounds! I said I wasn't going to get on a scale again until April 1, but hey, who expected me to stick to that? I weighed today and I'm down three pounds. Oh, and I weighed after lunch. Now only 6,997 to go!! But I feel good to be working out and I feel very motivated. So far I've done the following:
- Sunday: Yoga 1hr
- Monday: Lower body machines and 20 min on treadmill
- Tuesday: 40 min on treadmill at home
- Wednesday: Body Pump 1hr, 40 on treadmill
- Thursday: 40 minutes on treadmill at home
I'm not much on going by myself to things. I'm really a big chicken. I hate feeling uncomfortable and I do when I go by myself. It's so much easier to just stay home. But this is a new year and I'm working on the outside AND the inside, so if I need to go solo I will. In all of my floppy, skirted bathing suit glory!!!!
And just let me take a moment to thank Poodle Head and My Two Sons for motivating me to get to the gym and for going with me. You chicks rock! Even if both of your asses don't add up to mine!
Punkin, though, is not afraid of anything. He is such a little man. He absolutely loved going to the kids area at the gym and is all ready for our next visit. I am so proud of him. Maybe we'll try the water workout tomorrow evening and he can get a chance to play again. Damn, I love him.
The other day he asked for his bug juice and I said sure he could have it.
He said "Oh, my! Tremendous!!!"
I guess it was much funnier in person than here, but it was pretty funny at the time. I assume one of his teachers must say that at MDO or something. Just more proof that we really need to watch our language because if he hears it he WILL repeat it.
Tonight we had bunco scheduled. We also have tornado watches and severe weather predicted for exactly the time we would be driving there. So it is off. I love some bunco and I'm pissed at the weather. I wonder if you can play online bunco.......at least until the power goes out.
Ok, I'm out of here. I need to check on that online bunco. I also need to check on my scrabulous games. I'm feeling a streak of decent letters coming on............
Lisa is hosting Fun Monday this week. And get this - she wants to hear about our pets. Geeze, I'd never brag on my pets, even if they are the smartest, sweetest, cutest, cuddliest, most well behaved cats on earth. I'd never brag, even if they don't shed, their litter box doesn't stink, they don't track litter all over my house and they make dinner for me on Wednesday nights.
But to be nice and to not hurt Lisa's feelings, I'll play along. Just this once though. I'll return to my modest and self deprecating self tomorrow.
So I have cats. Did I mention that? Currently I have only three. Sometimes the house feels empty with only three. Did you know that four cats is the perfect number? With four cats one is always in sight. With three sometimes they are all off minding their own business, but with four one is always available.
As a child I didn't like cats. I don't know why, I just didn't. I was a dog person. Then my third year in college I got an apartment and wanted a dog. A daschund. At the time the going rate for one was about $200. I made $3.45 per hour. The dog just wasn't going to happen. So I went to the animal shelter and got a cat.
And that folks, was all she wrote. I became the crazy cat lady. Since that time I have had some wonderful cats. Sadly, we have been afflicted off and on with feline leukemia. Never, however cute they may be, take a stray cat into your home without having it tested first.
Anyway, first there was Sugar, the cat from the shelter.Then there was Patches, aka Poo Poo. I had him until he was 19 years old. He was such a member of the family.Then we were adopted by a wonderful litter of kittens - Jack, Tiger, Blondie and Pretty Girl. That Tiger and Blondie? Best bedtime snugglers EVAH!
While in Massachusetts we adopted Butterbean, Tabby, and TheoDid I mention Theo is a climber?Currently, we still have Pretty Girl (from the Alabama litter) and Tabby and Theo from MA. As I type this post Tabby is sitting half on the back of the love seat, half on my shoulder. She's a sweetie, though she worships hubby and not me. Which is funny because she was supposed to be mine and Theo was supposed to be hubby's. So goes it.
I can't imagine the house without a cat in it. I would imagine the next addition will be a dog, though hubby tells me no. Yet he doesn't seem to be able to tell Punkin no so when he really starts begging I expect him to cave pretty quickly.
Ok, that's it for me. Go over to Lisa's place and check out the other Fun Monday posts. I know they won't be able to compare to my wonderful kitties, but stop by so they won't feel neglected.
Go now. Bye.
at 8:32 AM | Labels: fun Monday
I lived through yoga, though it totally, thoroughly kicked my ass! This class was supposed to be pretty basic, as opposed to the "power yoga". I think I shall avoid power yoga like I avoid housework. At. All. Costs.
At one point we were doing this stretch, the warrior something or the other, and the instructor actually came over and sat on me!!! Well, Poodle Head said she actually just leaned on me, but damn, she must have been leaning with her whole body! What is funny is the last time I did a class with Poodle Head I felt like I had my own personal instructor. The lady recognized that I was new and pretty much directed me individually through about half of the class.
Today? I was getting no attention. I had even told Poodle Head that I didn't feel special. ~sniff~ Of course a few minutes later I have some chick sitting on me!! Lesson to self: Keep your big mouth shut.
I went by Publix on the way home and got some spinach and fresh Parmesan so we could have a nice salad for dinner tonight. Of course hubby pissed me off when I got home and now he can just go eat dirt for all I care. Oh, well. Two months without a fight was a little long, don't you think?
I head back to the gym in the morning. No yoga, but cardio and weights. I may have to crawl out to my car when I am through. If you happen to see me, please, no laughing.
Or at least try to be discreet about it.
Yes, this may be it for me. If I'm not back, it was nice getting to know you all.
What's going on you ask?
The gym. Yeah, I joined one in November. How many times have I been since I joined?
Yep. None. Zilch. Nada. Zero times. Today? I'm getting started. I'm going to a yoga class at 3:30 and then plan on going M, W, F mornings from now on. Minimum. So my fat ass just may die today from actually moving around and I just wanted to tell you all I'll miss you if I do.
Well, I guess if I actually die I won't be missing you, but you know what I mean. Please, be thinking about me and sending good vibes my way. My work out partner today goes to the gym most every day and is in better shape than I can even dream of being in. This will either be motivating or extremely depressing. I'm gonna hope for motivating, but........
And no. This isn't a New Year's resolution. I gave up on those long ago. Plus, since I joined the gym in 2007 it doesn't qualify. December was just SOOO busy. But now? No excuses. Punkin starts back to school on Monday and I'm gonna hit it hard. I need to lose about 7,000 pounds so I better hit it extra hard!
How is everyone else this lovely Sunday morning? Punkin is off to church with my mother and she is actually bringing him back here afterwards. Being that she drove up here yesterday this made me rather suspicious, but hey, as long as I don't have to drive to pick him up I'll just shut up about it.
I need to get up and get started on the packing up the Christmas stuff. It is so depressing to see the tree without any presents under it. I seriously thought about wrapping up some empty boxes since it is taking so long to get the damn thing dismantled. But hubby is on his way to the basement now to bring up the boxes so I guess I'll get most of it done this morning.
Ok, you guys get up and get going, too. If you have nothing else to do, feel free to come help me box up Christmas ornaments!
Happy New Year to all of you!!! Though as frequently as I've been posting lately there are probably only three of you reading this. Damn, weren't the holidays busy? For a hermit and couch potato like me there was way more activity than usual.
But this is the new year and I plan on making it a better one. Getting up and going to the gym. Spending more time with my Punkin and my hubby. Actually getting along with my hubby. Getting pregnant FINALLY. It better happen this year or it won't be happening, you know?
My outlook this year is totally different than it was this time last year and I couldn't be happier to say that. I'm enjoying life, not sweating the small stuff and getting along with hubby. Looks like I'll stay married, which being that I don't have a job is a great thing! Ok, it's great for a lot more reasons than that, but I don't want to get all mushy here before breakfast.
Can I just say my happy pills (no longer crazy pills because I'm not crazy, just a bit overwhelmed) ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!
We are off this morning to spend the day and night with my sister. Punkin is excited to see his cousin (one won't be there) and I hope he has fun. I won't be online much as I won't have my laptop with me and hate to leave a trail to "my world" on someone else's computer.
Is that weird? I love my blog and your blogs and I just kind of want to keep that to myself and not share it with my "real life" acquaintances. Other than the nonjudgmental ones, that it is. These days it seems half of my moms group is blogging! And pregnant. Those are some fertile girls!
One of them just had a miscarriage. I know how rotten she feels and while I don't want to out her here, yall be thinking about her and sending good vibes her way. Big hugs to you, girl!!!
Ok, off to cook breakfast and get myself prettified (yeah, right) and packed and hit the road. I promise some non boring posts in the next week and to get to the awards and memes, too. Thanks for hanging in there with me and for making 2007 much better than it would have been.
I can't wait to share 2008 with you all!