I've been without internet access for the last week. It was pure hell. I felt like some junkie unable to score her next fix. Seriously. I am so not exaggerating. Well, maybe a little, but not very much. How did we ever survive before the internet and high speed connections? Life sure was different.
The whole thing started because I talk too much. Oh, and that I want to share my brilliance with the US, Canada and Mexico. At a reasonable price, of course. So I decided to drop AT&T and move to Vonage. Sounds simple enough, right?
Wrong. No. Hell fucking no. I go to Walmart to buy my Vonage box thingie. You know I was all over the $50 gift card I'd get for instore activation. The WalMart employees? No fucking clue what I was talking about. Anyway, after about thirty minutes of convincing them of what they needed to do I was activated and my gift card was on its way.
Easy peasy, right? NO. I get an email from Vonage saying that I need to do something about my DSL line. I confer with My2Sons and find out I need a stand alone DSL line. I call AT&T, chick says she can hook me up immediately so that I don't end up without a phone.
About five days later when Vonage finally gets around to starting my service I have about half a day of super cheap phone service AND DSL. Then? Right in the middle of chatting with Catwoman I lose my signal. No phone. No internet. Turns out Chick doesn't know her ass from a hole in the ground! .
I call AT&T (furthermore to be referred to as TF (those fuckers)) and TF tell me that not only is my service not active, but it is not supposed to be active until Monday, which is 4 1/2 days away. After I go bat shit on Habib he transfers me to Alabama tech service. Of course he gives me the phone number - just in case - which sounds something like - two oh grrskjeu038hjkfjdsj092qwhnbsl,mhj - after which I immediately get cut off.
I then get Habib the Second who is again going to hook me up. He's the customer service manager or some thing and will get me online tomorrow. Of course we already know TF don't know shit so this doesn't happen. On Monday I am informed that no, the service won't be active that day. Just because they sent me a letter saying Monday and just because TF said Monday, it doesn 't mean Monday. It means up to 72 hours after Monday.
Holy shit. How much more is a
I talk to Habib the Third. After a while he decides it is my modem and I try a new one (which TF sent me even though I told them I didn't need it) and wha la, it works. Then while talking to billing about how
Luckily the girl at billing offers to connect me to someone who isn't speaking english as their thirty third language and this girl immediately says she'll send a guy out, but I may have to pay $85. I tell her I'll show him my boobs if he'll just fix this shit once and for all. She laughed. Obviously she thought I was kidding.
And I was. Screw the boobs. I'd probably give a blow job for it.
Anyway, miracle of miracles, they have an opening for this morning between 8 and 12 and the guy actually shows up at about 9am. He has my problem solved withing about 5 minutes (my surge protector is not DSL compatible) and
While testing my connection he pulled up Google and I suggested he type in AT&T sucks. He starts laughing because it pulled up like 24K+ hits! Guess I'm not the only one with issues. So guy leaves, I feed my addiction and the story ends and now I'm back and boring the shit out of you again.
I really think I need to find something to obsess on other than this damn internet. Hubby suggest his bod, but damn, after 2 1/2 years of trying to get pregnant that just isn't my thing.
But hey, I can now call whomever I want, whenever I want, without worrying about the cost! So if I have your number you might want to block me or I might just call and talk your ear off. I'm glad to be back though, I missed you, love you, and sure as hell won't be able to catch up on your wonderful blogs. But I'm thinking about it and it's the thought that counts. Right?