Today is the first day of school! Yipeeeee! I guess I really shouldn't care, as I have no school aged children. I am being totally selfish in my glee that the little
I love, love, love my own child and I find that, since having him, I definitely really like other children that I meet. That I meet. Ok, maybe I like all babies, even if I haven't been formally introduced. This must be the result of some hormonal change brought on by pregnancy because prior to it I didn't like any kind of kids. Young, old (old kid? it's all relative, you smart ass), known, unknown. They all annoyed me. But now.....
Maybe I should qualify my dislike. I don't think it's actually the kids, well not all of the kids, but kids with "the attitude". You know the "I'm sooo cool, my shit doesn't stink, I can do what I want, you're not my Mom" attitude. I'm sure I had some of it at that age, but damn, these kids are annoying. They ride around our subdivision on golf carts. Shouldn't you need a license for any motorized vehicle you plan to drive on a paved road? Or into someone else's yard? They don't move out of the way when you come by. They look at you like you are the one in the way.
They splash my kid at the pool. By accident, of course. The minute you aren't looking they appropriate his toys as their own. Now if they are so damn grown up, why the hell do they need to play with my two year olds balls? (Now that just didn't sound right, did it?!?!?) Then they get all pissy when you ask for the toys back. How dare you address them?
They play with their footballs, their baseballs, hell, with their own balls, in the street and are sooo annoyed when they have to move to make way for your car, if they bother to move at all. How dare I want to drive to my house? And we do not live in the inner city where no one has yards. These kids have yards, back and front, that they could play in.
I think the problem is that their parents must not like them anymore than I do. They send them outside with the keys to the cart and tell them to come back at dinner time. They run wild, they terrorize toddlers and motorists. They make out while driving their carts in and out of other peoples yards. They are annoying pains in the ass and they are out of their parents hair for the day.
Anyway, the little monsters are back at school, so me and my little monster will be headed to the pool most every morning until it closes. We'll play with our own balls (hehe, you said balls) and splash each other and have all kinds of mommy/baby fun without unruly, annoying, horny adolescent disapproval tossed our way.
We're on our way there now. Wanna join us?
*Oh, and before I start getting flamed for this post, of course, I didn't mean your kids! Your kids are great!!!!